Scatter shots

Wow, what a wealth, a veritable treasure trove, of news this morning. I gulped my tea and wolfed down 2 donuts from my secret supplier as I scanned the lap. Have I mentioned these buttermilk nuggets are the best deep fried diabetic (stole the word from Justified) carbs in Oakland?

Floyd Landis. In 2006 when Landis was accused of testosterone doping in the Tour de France, I asked a couple of my world class cyclist pals if they thought he was clean. They both laughed at my naivety. They said 98% of the tour was dirty. The first man to be stripped of the Tour de France title, Landis spent two million dollars defending himself against the accusations. Today, the disgraced Landis purged himself publicly in a Wall St Journal article and admitted to doping since 2002 when he was a member of the US Postal service team. He also pointed the finger at Lance Armstrong (who has always been under heavy doping suspicion), and other members of the team. Testosterone, human growth hormone, and blood transfusions were on the list of performance enhancing drugs of choice. A long time ago, I remember hearing that Armstrong had a residence in Spain. A friend pointed out that Spain is the chemistry mecca, the mother lode of illegal sports substances. Uh-huh.

Mothers. In long black robes, heads covered, the mothers of imprisoned Sarah Shourd, Shane Bauer, and Josh Fattal after petitioning Tehran for months were granted visitation rights as an Islamic humanitarian gesture. Sarah Shourd was quoted as saying conditions were decent but that she was isolated and lonely. Unofficially charged with espionage, the three young Americans, while hiking wandered into Iranian territory and have been held as political pawns since last July. Sarah Shourd worked as a student in the Main Library of UCB. The whole world is watching, Sarah, especially the blue and gold.

Meg Whitman. 64 million pumped into the campaign trail. I watched the latest 30 second ad, referred to as the 'Plan,' (not to be confused with the brilliant BSG plan) at least 10 times. Using a fade to black and white, Meg swore to secure the border, and continue the war on immigration. She invoked the use of the National Guard, and a litany of no driver's license, no amnesty, and no sanctuary cities. War? Really. Not finished, Meg attacked the unions and state pensions. Whoa. Can and deliver those 30 seconds to SNL. Whitman, stripped of 'sista' and void of hood, joins Carly Fiorina, and Condi Rice in the Gender Pantheon Hall of Shame.